80,Black 80, Blue Go. I took my normal kick step expecting Ray to bullrush. As I shot my hands into his chest, I felt an all to familiar pain in my knee. I dropped like a bag of bricks, grimacing in pain. My knee dislocated laterally rupturing my patella tendon. At that moment I knew my football career was over. I hadn’t accomplished the many goals I had set for myself in prior years. At that time football was my entire identity. It was what I had worked so relentlessly for and now it was being snatched from me in a matter of seconds. Two weeks prior my girlfriend of 3 years and I had called it quits. Football was my release from reality, and in that moment I knew football would only be a dream. Rehab began a few weeks after reconstructive surgery. It was definitely a one step forward three steps back type of scenario. It was the worse pain I had ever experienced which was compounded by the end of my relationship. I spiraled down into the darkest point of my life. Suicide tapped me on my shoulder daily. I had no self esteem, full of self pity, and no idea of which path I should take next. Drugs and alcohol became my new release from the reality that was my life. I had no drive and nothing to live for. My thoughts were very negative. I was my own worse enemy. As I began to recover enough to stand on two feet, my first distraction became the Atlanta nightlife. My leg was wrapped in a thigh high knee brace for extra support but my mind was vulnerable. I was seeking comfort in the clubs and in the parties. I was searching for anything that would give me the high of temporary happiness. Self doubt was now etched into my very being. I left school early to pursue football and did not finish my degree. The more I thought about the journey ahead of me the lower I fell. My parents were worried about me and what I might do. My lowest point came when I found myself in a jail cell, one of many self inflicted problems. I could feel the tears coming. I quickly closed my eyes to hide in shame in a cell with 5 other people, thats when the Lord spoke to me and asked me a simple question. “When are you going to stop yourself from hurting”. It was a baffling question to me at the time and it made me angry. I had no control over my circumstances or my emotions, I blamed Him. I asked Him how could He let this happen to me? All power, knowledge and understanding are a blink of an eye to you, how could you do this to me? He replied with one phrase that planted the seed that would grow into my new belief system. “You did this to yourself”. I wanted to place the blame on everything else but the one who was responsible. I had open doors for the devil to walk through and release havoc into my existence, I was battling the “Dangers of my mind”. Luckily, that phrase works both ways. I can do it to myself I questioned? Im an analytical thinker, I began thinking of ways and ideas to “do it to myself”. I started what I now call today think tank sessions. I would run through thoughts and strategies of ways I could pull myself out of my situation. I knew school was something I had to finish for my own satisfaction. The next problem I needed to fix was what would I do for a living now that my playing days were over. At the time it was so obvious what I should do I overlooked it time and time again. I hadn’t realized a passion Ive had since I was a freshman in college. I loved to design spaces, paint walls, add decor, and place furniture in a way to create a more home like ambiance. My freshman year in college, I laid carpet on my dorm room floors because I hated the look and feel of that cold peel and stick tile. I bought lamps because I hated the look of those florescent lights that made the room seem like a cafeteria. I made 200 square feet feel like 300. My father had always been interested in real estate, so I began to study the business. Hgtv became a channel I watched like sports center. I began to pray and ask God to show me the way. This eventually lead me back to Mississippi. Atlanta had way to many distractions for me to accomplish what I was trying to achieve. I had to leave it in the rearview mirror until I was mature enough to handle my calling. My focus became razor sharp. Excuses where things of the past replaced with statements of just get it done. When I felt an excuse coming on I replaced it with, “just get it done”. I let time frames go. We tend to expect things to be done by a certain benchmark, a year, six months, or even a few weeks. I quickly learned when you follow God and His plan for your life, your timing and your own trust in what you as a person can accomplish tend to hinder what He has in store for you. I honestly felt like He would push it back every time I set a date. Lean not on your own understanding, He said to me and ive tried to follow that command ever since. Flash forward 2 years and I now have a real estate investment firm that is growing exponentially. Lamont & Son Realty is my passion manifested and my calling to help others realize how important financial literacy is in our society. Ill be graduating from Mississippi University for Women in December and plan to expand my business to the greater Atlanta area. Patiently waiting for the ok from the man upstairs can be a tedious and daunting task, but believe me, it is well worth the wait.